Yesterday I saw the mediator again, while I was talking to my mom. It was around 9:30 PM and she was waiting for her boyfriend. It was a cold July night and there was heavy wind blowing. Clearly for most people, this wouldn’t be the time, they would like to venture out, let alone, stand outside. But here she was, with no signs of regret or tiredness on her face, patiently waiting for her boyfriend. How beautiful………
Standing in the cold wind was definitely suffering, but it didn’t give her any pain. Now imagine, that this couple breaks up after a few months. Looking back, these would be some of the moments she would regret a lot. She would wonder why did she ‘waste’ her time, waiting for a ‘creep’ like this. When she looks back at this instance, sometime later, with regret in her heart, that would give her pain. I was reminded of what nithyananda swami said a few weeks back, “Suffering necessary does not create pain, But it is the thought of suffering that produces pain”. That is, suffering may happen to you on a regular basis, but pain….. that requires conscious effort.
Even the photos that you have might have taken with your ex boyfriend or ex husband, starts to look ugly and the memories painful when you’re in a committed relationship with a new guy/ girl. The photos have remained the same but your current situation has changed and all the suffering you went through, in your previous relationship to make it successful(which you enjoyed previously) will start giving you pain. More and more pain. To the extent, some people even destroy those beautiful memories.
My dear friend, please do not equate pain with suffering. All of us go through suffering but it’s your thought about that suffering which will give you pain .
God blesss
